我发现了一个非常简单易行的解决办法

    fun showDialog(){
    val dialog = Dialog(this@DialogActivity)
    dialog.requestWindowFeature(Window.FEATURE_NO_TITLE)
    dialog.setCancelable(false)
    dialog.setContentView(R.layout.custom_dialog)
    val txtTitle = dialog.findViewById<TextView>(R.id.txtTitle)
    val btn  = dialog.findViewById<Button>(R.id.button)

    btn.setOnClickListener {
        Toast.makeText(this,"test",Toast.LENGTH_SHORT).show()
    }
    txtTitle.setText("ali")
    dialog.show()

    val window = dialog.window
    window?.setLayout(WindowManager.LayoutParams.MATCH_PARENT,WindowManager.LayoutParams.WRAP_CONTENT)
}

在对话框窗口上指定FILL_PARENT，就像其他人建议的那样，对我来说并不管用(在Android 4.0.4上)，因为它只是拉伸了黑色对话框背景来填充整个屏幕。

正常工作的方法是使用最小显示值，但在代码中指定它，以便对话框占用屏幕的90%。

So:

Activity activity = ...;
AlertDialog dialog = ...;

// retrieve display dimensions
Rect displayRectangle = new Rect();
Window window = activity.getWindow();
window.getDecorView().getWindowVisibleDisplayFrame(displayRectangle);

// inflate and adjust layout
LayoutInflater inflater = (LayoutInflater)activity.getSystemService(Context.LAYOUT_INFLATER_SERVICE);
View layout = inflater.inflate(R.layout.your_dialog_layout, null);
layout.setMinimumWidth((int)(displayRectangle.width() * 0.9f));
layout.setMinimumHeight((int)(displayRectangle.height() * 0.9f));

dialog.setView(layout);

一般来说，在大多数情况下，只调整宽度就足够了。

public static WindowManager.LayoutParams setDialogLayoutParams(Activity activity, Dialog dialog)
    {
        try 
        {
            Display display = activity.getWindowManager().getDefaultDisplay();
            Point screenSize = new Point();
            display.getSize(screenSize);
            int width = screenSize.x;

            WindowManager.LayoutParams layoutParams = new WindowManager.LayoutParams();
            layoutParams.copyFrom(dialog.getWindow().getAttributes());
            layoutParams.width = (int) (width - (width * 0.07) ); 
            layoutParams.height = WindowManager.LayoutParams.WRAP_CONTENT;
            return layoutParams;
        } 
        catch (Exception e)
        {
            e.printStackTrace();
            return null;
        }
    }

这里有一个简短的答案，对我来说是有效的(在API 8和API 19上测试)。

Dialog mDialog;
View   mDialogView;
...
// Get height
int height = mDialog.getWindow()
.getWindowManager().getDefaultDisplay()
.getHeight();

// Set your desired padding (here 90%)
int padding = height - (int)(height*0.9f);

// Apply it to the Dialog
mDialogView.setPadding(
// padding left
0,
// padding top (90%)
padding, 
// padding right
0, 
// padding bottom (90%)
padding);

    ...
    AlertDialog.Builder builder = new AlertDialog.Builder(getActivity());
    Dialog d = builder.create(); //create Dialog
    d.show(); //first show

    DisplayMetrics metrics = new DisplayMetrics(); //get metrics of screen
    getActivity().getWindowManager().getDefaultDisplay().getMetrics(metrics);
    int height = (int) (metrics.heightPixels*0.9); //set height to 90% of total
    int width = (int) (metrics.widthPixels*0.9); //set width to 90% of total

    d.getWindow().setLayout(width, height); //set layout

到目前为止我能想到的最简单的方法

如果你的对话框是由垂直线性布局组成的，只需添加一个“高度填充”虚拟视图，它将占据屏幕的整个高度。

例如:

<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<LinearLayout xmlns:android="http://schemas.android.com/apk/res/android"
          android:orientation="vertical"
          android:layout_width="match_parent"
          android:layout_height="match_parent"
          android:weightSum="1">

    <EditText
       android:layout_width="match_parent"
       android:layout_height="wrap_content"
       android:id="@+id/editSearch" />

    <ListView
       android:layout_width="match_parent"
       android:layout_height="match_parent"
       android:id="@+id/listView"/>


   <!-- this is a dummy view that will make sure the dialog is highest -->
   <View
       android:layout_width="match_parent"
       android:layout_height="match_parent"
       android:layout_weight="1"/>

</LinearLayout>

注意LinearLayout属性中的android:weightSum="1"和dummy View属性中的android:layout_weight="1"